When you think you have life somewhat figured out grandchildren turn your world around and change your perspective on what is important. Before I had grandchildren my husband and I took some marvelous vacations, just the two of us. Our kids were older and no longer wanting to travel with us and we had so much fun with that freedom. Then the grand kids started coming. They were all born in North Carolina and lived there for 6 years before moving back home. All of my vacations from that point forward were geared toward visiting them. Sometimes we worked it into a vacation such as meeting halfway or going to the beach with them. I wouldn't trade those trips for all the European vacations in the world. I hated leaving them and returning home and hated the thought that I was missing out on school music programs, ballgames and overnights at my house. I can see why many couples retire early and move to live closer to their children. I was so fortunate that my family moved closer to me.
Like any grandparent I LOVE my grandchildren. I think having grandchildren is one of the most awesome experiences of my life. I can't say that I love them more than my own children but I do love them differently. Again I can look at children and see their unique talents and wonder at how their lives will develop and who they will become. I marvel at their imagination and eagerness to learn and do new things. The treat is that I don't bear that same responsibility that parents feel toward their children. But I do have a responsibility to them. Grandparents should show children that love is unconditional and reinforce to them their originality. We should help them to develop self esteem and self confidence that they can rely on in the future when they are adults and facing difficult choices. And we can share family stories that only we know.
Our world has gotten so mobile that families don't stay together like they used to in the same community, sometimes even in the same house, for generations. I wonder frequently and think we've lost something by having such a mobile society. My grandmother lived a block from my house and 2 aunts/uncles lived in houses between ours and hers. Both my parents worked but when my sister and I came home from school or during summer break I had my grandmother and 2 aunts that were close and always home to watch out for me. No need for a strange babysitter. And it was free. I paid them with my love. And I'm sure Mom and Dad did favors for them in return. What a great system that was! Flash forward to the next generation and I didn't live quite so close to my parents but did remain in the same community to raise my children. My Mom and Dad came to see their grandchildren almost every day. They even moved closer to me to enable more time with them. I can't imagine what I would have done without them and all the assistance they provided in raising my kids. Not just babysitting but transportation, meals, homework help, teaching skills - in truth just being there when needed.
So I am glad my children live in this same community and I hope that I can be half as good a grandparent as my parents and grandmother were. And spending more quality time with my grandchildren is high on my bucket list when I retire.
I think I'm learning as much from my grandchildren as I hope they are learning from me. I've learned how precious time is when I see how fast they grow and change. My whole outlook on healthy living has changed so I can hopefully be around longer to watch them continue to grow. I've learned that a clean and orderly home is not necessary. It's much more important to spend that time with them or my husband or doing something rewarding for myself than it is to spend time being a slave to my house. I've learned to be creative and live in the moment. I can see life through a child's eyes again and it's a wonderful thing!
I started out saying they were on my mind. I should have said on my mind, in my house, eating my food, etc. Of course, I love it. This weekend started with overnights and ballgames. Friday my oldest grand daughter cheered, played basketball AND sang the National Anthem at her grade school's games. She was wonderful. She made all A's on her report card too. Then she woke at home yesterday with pain in her abdomen. It turned out to be appendicitis. She's had her appendix out now and will be released today to go home. My husband and I watched the 2 younger ones so Mom and Dad could be with her. So yesterday was filled with golf, basketball, hover board and pizza! It was hard not to be there at the hospital but as grandparents we do what is needed and I'm glad we're here for them. I'm sure she'll pull through and be back to her usual self soon.
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| heading out for shopping and lunch |
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| mastering chopsticks |
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| fun on the hover board |
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| team spirit |
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